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Messages - kaji

I tried to use that workbook several years ago and I know it would be extremely helpful for me (and all of us here who are C-PTSD!) but the problem with me is that all of the recovery tools I have found over the years end up only being used for a day or two!  I know working on yourself requires a huge commitment and alot of time (which I have) but because the C-PTSD causes so much depression, etc. it is very hard for me to stick with doing the "serious" work that the workbook requires because it makes you relive what you went through and makes me feel even more inferior and putting my symptoms in the fore-front!  I am at a loss as to how to work through the workbook!  Does anybody have any ideas that have worked for them?
Over the years, this has been the hardest for me!  I have wrecked alot of friendships & relationships and have caused alot of unnecessary turmoil with no understanding as to why!  When I read this article the other night it gave me a whole new insight as to why and brought tears to my eyes!  Here is the link-   "Understanding Complex Trauma, Complex Reactions, and Treatment Approaches"
Ideas/Tools for Recovery / Re: Music for recovery
March 27, 2017, 05:17:03 PM
Hi everyone!  I'm new here but would like to say that over all these years the best music for me is always upbeat & optimistic (like Earth, Wind & Fire) or instrumental (like Jeff Beck's Blow by Blow) or tons of songs by Led Zeppelin.  Music that makes you feel happy & confident, makes you wanna dance or "takes you away" is what has helped me the most out of anything!  It doesn't make you sad or re-live break-ups, or remind you of abusive person/people!  Alot of other kinds of music seems to only keep my symptoms in the foreground and then I end up worse off...  sometimes for days on end until I force my self to do my style of "music therapy".
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hi I'm new
March 27, 2017, 04:55:26 PM
Thanks for the welcome and understanding! Feels so good to know others are going thru this lifelong battle!  I have been doing yoga stretches for all my aches & pains and I do listen to a ton of music, which seems to help the most (but only when I have my full-size headphones on & the volume cranked) so my hearing is pretty shot after all these years! It's worth it for all the relief it gives me though!  lol Am looking forward to working on myself through this forum!
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Hi I'm new
March 27, 2017, 03:13:45 AM
I am a 50+ woman and last night was the 1st time I ever heard of C-PTSD and I'll tell you what I cried my eyes out and at the same time am finally relieved to have read such an excellent article describing almost exactly how I've felt & what I've been going through all my life!  I was horribly physically abused many times a day, everyday since I was a toddler (and probably since I was born). I finally got the courage to runaway when I was 15 and never spoke to her again!  I did alot of partying early on and have been in & out of the jug every few years up until about 10 yrs ago. During this past 10 years I have lost a ton of people whom I considered my family (illnesses, car wrecks, etc.)  And in the midst of all that the unthinkable happened... my oldest son, who was always the apple of my eye, very successful & intelligent turned into a really drug addict and lost everything he worked so hard for, including me & his little brother.  My boys are my only family & I felt like I have had about a thousand nervous breakdowns these past 7 or 8 maybe 9 years.  Life hasn't been enjoyable... Anyway, there's more but that should suffice for my intro for now.