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Messages - damagedfruit

#1
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: My Own Brain
August 20, 2023, 02:53:00 AM
Quote from: Kizzie on August 19, 2023, 03:52:30 PMHi and a warm welcome to the forum  :heythere:  It does happen as we age that physical and life changes can bring things to the surface we thought we'd handled or maybe didn't even know were buried. That happened to me last year as I wrestled with becoming a senior and the changes that come with that. It was a struggle but I am feeling better now.

Becoming older isn't actually something that is out there in any of the books and articles about CPTSD; that is, relational trauma over the lifespan and gender based changes (menopause). I'm glad you brought it up and I hope those of us who have gone through it can share and discuss this. It might be helpful to all of us who are experiencing age related changes and challenges.

Thanks, Kizzie. I look forward to hearing from the 60+ crowd if they have anything to share.

I've read all about the correlation between CPTSD and the chances of developing heart disease, diabetes, depression, etc. What I haven't seen anywhere is anything about your body actually becoming frozen in trauma, 40 years after the fact, to the point of stiffness and having to remind yourself to breathe.
#2
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: My Own Brain
August 20, 2023, 02:47:32 AM
My psychotherapist believes it's due to "failure of repression," which maintains that, as we age, our brain gets tired easier just like our arms, legs, and backs do. Apparently, it's a lot of work for the brain repressing things.  :Idunno:


Quote from: Bewildered on August 19, 2023, 02:15:20 AMWelcome to the forum Damaged Fruit.  I am also new to the group.  Somehow we manage to live "normal" lives when we are younger.  But, as life adds to our list of burdens, it gets harder and harder to carry them. I am thankful for a group like this where we can be real.
#3
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: My Own Brain
August 20, 2023, 02:44:29 AM
Pardon my ignorance. Can you tell me what you are referencing when you say EFs?
Thanks for any help.

Quote from: NarcKiddo on August 19, 2023, 01:39:06 PMWelcome.

I think menopause can be a huge emotional upheaval at the best of times with all the hormonal fluctuations. I also thought I was "over" many things, but all I had really done was store them in the attic of my brain rather than clear them out. I started therapy after what I now know to be EFs became stronger and harder to deal with. I initially assumed it was menopause but when HRT helped with many physical symptoms but barely touched the mental ones I knew I had to seek other help.

I wish you all the best on your path to recovery.
#4
Please Introduce Yourself Here / My Own Brain
August 18, 2023, 07:34:49 PM
I am here to get well, to find peace, to achieve that self-actualization Maslow hinted at.  :spooked:

My stuff was all prior to age 18, and going on to be a productive member of society doing good work, I thought I was over it.
Enter menopause, and a failure of repression, and everything has changed.
I recently weaned off of the anti-depressant I had been taking >25 years; it wasn't helping anyway.
I have lost years of time. I don't want to lose anymore.
I want to be well.
#5
Poetry & Creative Writing / Re: [CSA Trigger Warning]
August 18, 2023, 06:55:04 PM
:'( I'm sorry for what you had to endure...