Quote from: Cascade on May 12, 2024, 11:17:46 PMGuess we just haven't laid the trusting groundwork that would be needed for me to respond more honestly. There was a part of me (larger than expected) that just wanted to unload on him and tell him everything. No, I'm not okay. I've been in an emotional flashback for two and half months, and dealing with all the instability of CPTSD and oh yeah, left my job!
I feel like there is a part of you that really wants to at least be heard and maybe it is possible. You won't ever know until you give it a shot. That said, as Phoebes suggested, when we come from families like ours it's probably best to dip a toe in rather jump straight in. That way you can gauge what his interest in more of a relationship is and what he's prepared to hear about from you.
Recently I skipped my NM's memorial service and told my brother the reason was that I didn't feel the same way as he does about our mother and at some point if he's interested in hearing about that from me we could have a talk. He did say he was coming our way in the fall and maybe we could get together so he didn't dismiss it out of hand and seemed interested to hear what I had to say. I don't hold out a lot of hope for a better relationship though as he's an N too, but at least I will be heard and just that is important and enough for me.
Kizzie