I've known that I have CPTSD for two years. but I can't get out of flashbacks for a very looooong time. why things are so painful
I had a fight with my sister she told me that she reacted this way because my voice tone is angry and I get nervous, edgy and defensive very easily even in small disagreements about general topic and even if she does the same sometimes it's my fault I shouldn't continue arguing with an angry person.
This is a repeated problem with my family, from a very young age they can get angry but I can't. They cay that I'm always edgy but they are always screaming but if I'm the youngest I can't do the same.
why passive manipulative passive aggressive people are more loved? I feel that the whole world reject me.
No words can't describe how I feel and describe past million fights. And my sister who I trust who always told me why do you get into discussions with them?
Back to our maim problem: When she told me my reaction to any minor disagreement is defensive, I'm thinking maybe that's why I had missunderstanings with some people in the past two years and it's my fault I ask questions in a nervous or defensive tones or I seemed too controlling because of my nervous voice or attitude. if I'm a lovely girl with a soft voice maybe people would've loved me more like even my first session with a therapist she told me with an impatient voice some people try to be perfect which broke my heart as if my problems are not big enough.
I'm deeply heart broken and I feel that I deserved the bad treatment from some certain people in the past two years. I feel no one understands me, I feel I'm an empathy beggar
I had a fight with my sister she told me that she reacted this way because my voice tone is angry and I get nervous, edgy and defensive very easily even in small disagreements about general topic and even if she does the same sometimes it's my fault I shouldn't continue arguing with an angry person.
This is a repeated problem with my family, from a very young age they can get angry but I can't. They cay that I'm always edgy but they are always screaming but if I'm the youngest I can't do the same.
why passive manipulative passive aggressive people are more loved? I feel that the whole world reject me.
No words can't describe how I feel and describe past million fights. And my sister who I trust who always told me why do you get into discussions with them?
Back to our maim problem: When she told me my reaction to any minor disagreement is defensive, I'm thinking maybe that's why I had missunderstanings with some people in the past two years and it's my fault I ask questions in a nervous or defensive tones or I seemed too controlling because of my nervous voice or attitude. if I'm a lovely girl with a soft voice maybe people would've loved me more like even my first session with a therapist she told me with an impatient voice some people try to be perfect which broke my heart as if my problems are not big enough.
I'm deeply heart broken and I feel that I deserved the bad treatment from some certain people in the past two years. I feel no one understands me, I feel I'm an empathy beggar