Hi

[ricepen22]

Hi,
Disclaimer I am dyslexic and dyspraxia, i.e. I may read and write things wrong, it's not that i don't care or that I am in la la land

I thought I would join this site and see how it goes. my PTSD happed due to a few different constant trumers as a child. Left a long term relationship (10 years) 10 months ago (aprox), that was traumatic, especially the end, I am unsure if it was abusive, that's still being processed.

My main reason for exploring it more is that I have recently come to an epiphany. That as soon as my body feels like it can relax it dose. Only to possibly reanimate when stuff hits the fan.

my PTSD dose appear in belts of tiredness, this has got better, but its annoying. It used to paralyse me I would be crawling on the floor, to  get dressed to get to work/ college.

I feel like i cannot crack on with things normally. I know how to do it. but without a tone of proverbial hitting the fan, I have no jolt. I cannot win. All I want to do is get on.

When it is calm I am mentally tierd. and then I lack motivation, pushing myself and struggling through tasks so its not so hard later. the truth is I could do more, but I am so tierd and have a wall against it. These are things that I do want to do. and I know if i brake them up or do them now they'll be easer.

Then I have a sudden rush and do a really bad job of it. or I actully cannot make myself care. and I do care because I wouldn't be upset about it otherwise.

I do watch my coffee intake, but cafen dose help to get me up or  moving on a bad day especially.

If anyone has any tips on motivation. Braking the cycle etc that would be interesting. I am already working on it. How have others coped with being tierd?

[Three Roses]

Welcome, ricepen22! I'm glad you are here.

I also have that extreme tiredness that overcomes me, and I've yet to find anything that makes me feel energized; it just seems to happen on its own.

Sorry I wasn't much help but thanks for joining! 

[Wife#2]

Riceopen,

I don't know if this will help at all, but even if it only helps a little, that's something. Have you had your thyroid function tested? If so and it's fine, then I can offer no help at all - just a supportive spirit to let you know we hear you and we hope you can find some way towards better.

I just know that I was constantly exhausted, insomniac, barely able to function well enough to hold down a job. And that last was barely. With thyroid medication, everything didn't turn to sunshine and roses, but it did get better. I could sleep at last. I could keep my house better - not great, but better. I was also in therapy at that time, and the therapy helped a lot as well. That's all I can offer in the way of ideas.

Outside of that, just know you are heard, you matter and all of us here hope you can find some way to a better place. We'll be here and hope you will be as well.

[Kizzie]

Hi Riceopen - Don't know if any of my little strategies will help, but FWIW here are a few I use:

- I make a list of what I want to do that day, BUT now I keep it short and achievable.  I used to make long lists and would get tired and defeated just reading it 
- I take breaks in between tasks so I am not running down my energy.  I used to go full tilt to just get things done and didn't pay attention to being hungry or tired.  Now that I do I don't mind tasks quite as much and I'm not exhausted afterward. 
- I try and focus on the task rather than rushing through it and not being present (e.g., enjoying the feel and smell of the hot soapy water when I wash dishes and then feeling good seeing them all done and sparkly in the dish rack afterward). 
- I try to be less of a perfectionist. I used to feel I had failed if something I did wasn't 110%.  Now I try to understand and accept that I am human and don't need to be perfect.  Good enough is fine and saves a lot of time and stress 
- Finally, I really try nowadays to understand that I have Complex PTSD and that can be very draining so I have to pace myself, reduce stress,  and  rest more than others do.  It is what it is and it's OK now, I don't have to keep up.   

Hope some of this is helpful   

[ricepen22]

 

thankyou for the kind words,
I had all my bloods done and there is no enimia or thyrode issues or anything.
The list sounds like a plan, it is somthing I try occationly, but i just get tierd.

Thankyou for the replys, I really appreciate the support

[Kizzie]

   Ricepen, go slowly, be kind to yourself, and keep posting   

[Wife#2]

Remember, some days, just getting out of bed is as much as you can expect from yourself. That's ok. It's one small step on the way toward healing. It's always possible that, once you begin forgiving yourself and being kind to yourself, you'll be able to get out of bed and stay out of bed for four hours - that will be an accomplishment and positive progress. Count the little victories as worthy and they may begin to multiply. Some days it takes baby steps and that's ok.

[mook]

Hi Ricepen and welcome...

I do think the tiredness is very common, so you are definitely not alone, and I agree that kindness toward yourself is a great help, It's not easy at first, but it can become a new mantra that starts to take hold, fighting it can make it worse, because our internal battles seem to be the cause of it to some degree, it's exhausting being at war with oneself constantly, I consciously try to be the peacemaker and ask if we can take a break from the bickering, and with a little meditation, that seems to have an effect... do what you can when it feels good, and allow yourself the space when it doesn't, you are not wrong or bad at coping, you're in recovery from trauma, and these are symptoms, we can all keep reminding each other of that here, and remind ourselves at the same time...

the fact that you are here and sharing means you are already further down the road than you realise. 

[ricepen22]

  Thankyou people