i thought i was doing really well. i went swimming, did some work on my apartment, and planned to join a gym. i decided i was getting my old life back.
After a couple of days of feeling depressed and doing nothing, i realized i had done it again. Tried to convince myself i was cured. The truth is, i'm not getting my old life back. i can make progress and improve, but i still need to take things a little bit at a time. if i try to do too much, i get in trouble.
Two steps forward, one step back? You may not ever get your "old" life back, but when I think about it, no one does. Everyone's life reaches a fork in the road or a speed bump, and after that they're not the same. It just so happens our speed bumps were harsh, catastrophic, and caused measurable damage.
The effects of trauma on our physical brains, I'm coming to believe, can be reduced. We can get better! But we must give ourselves the time and gentleness to accomplish that.
Here's to your next 4 steps forward :)
Hey Cocobird!
You thought right in the first place. You went swimming, did some work on your apartment and had the motivation to join the gym. To me, you did well. If only for a little while, you got a break, you moved forward just that extra bit.
Those steps forward are small now, as they need to be, but when your head is ready they will get slowly bigger.
Thanks! Unfortunately, after doing all of those things, i did nothing for two days and felt miserable. i need to keep telling myself that any progress is good, and i'm much better than i was a year ago.
I do the same thing at the moment. Enjoying a bludge few days from the day or two of doing things a few days ago :) With time i'll fill in time with more things but right now, just doing what the brain and body can handle.
Quotei need to keep telling myself that any progress is good, and i'm much better than i was a year ago.
Yes. Because it's true :)