I just want to quickly introduced myself as I have just signed up for this forum. Sometime ago I determined I experience the symptoms of C-PTSD, but I have not really successfully dealt with it - I think - because no one really recognizes it as a real thing and my circumstances are not as common as many who dealt with years of childhood emotional abuse. I was married to a woman who was scarred by her up-bringing - a mother who was NPD or high functioning borderline. I don't believe my wife was full-blown NPD, though I think that such symptoms surfaced under stress. Nina Brown's book, "Loving the Self-Absorbed" (an excellent resource), identifed 4 kinds of "malignant" narcissists - one of which fit my wife to a "T". It was the most 'covert' of the categories (maybe it was called that) so I was the only one who really experienced it.
It took me a long time to recognize the subtle methods of verbal and emotional manipulation that she used and, being the 'rescuer" and responsible one", I worked hard to do what I could. Unfortunately, those we went to for help could not recognize the real issues and it took me a lot of self-study and self-analysis to finally figure out what was going on.
Long story short, we are no longer married, but the situation with the kids and between each other is pretty copacetic. So compared to many folks, my situation may not seem really bad right now. The problem is, I am still far from back to normal in my day-to-day functioning. I once was a business-owner and sold that and lived off that for a few years. I have some good professional talents and gifts, but I can't get my career back on track and - though I have a decent network of friends - have had no interest in resuming romantic involvements (its been 8 years since my divorce and I do not have problems meeting interesting people).
I still feel inadequate and can't carrying out some basic life functions. Nothing has worked, but I think that is because some of the things I need to do trigger paralyzing stuff that brings back painful baggage and a very intense experience of feeling trapped by subtle abuse and manipulation that no one else could see or understand.
I suppose that's enough for now. I came here because nothing else has worked for me and it's been very frustrating. I have studied a tremendous amount on related topics - but not recently. Did not really help to 'understand' what was going on with no one able to support you. I hope to check into some of the resources mentioned here, otherwise I am not sure my situation is enough like others to really help - but I appreciate that you all are here.
I just felt I should make an intro before posting on any threads.
It took me a long time to recognize the subtle methods of verbal and emotional manipulation that she used and, being the 'rescuer" and responsible one", I worked hard to do what I could. Unfortunately, those we went to for help could not recognize the real issues and it took me a lot of self-study and self-analysis to finally figure out what was going on.
Long story short, we are no longer married, but the situation with the kids and between each other is pretty copacetic. So compared to many folks, my situation may not seem really bad right now. The problem is, I am still far from back to normal in my day-to-day functioning. I once was a business-owner and sold that and lived off that for a few years. I have some good professional talents and gifts, but I can't get my career back on track and - though I have a decent network of friends - have had no interest in resuming romantic involvements (its been 8 years since my divorce and I do not have problems meeting interesting people).
I still feel inadequate and can't carrying out some basic life functions. Nothing has worked, but I think that is because some of the things I need to do trigger paralyzing stuff that brings back painful baggage and a very intense experience of feeling trapped by subtle abuse and manipulation that no one else could see or understand.
I suppose that's enough for now. I came here because nothing else has worked for me and it's been very frustrating. I have studied a tremendous amount on related topics - but not recently. Did not really help to 'understand' what was going on with no one able to support you. I hope to check into some of the resources mentioned here, otherwise I am not sure my situation is enough like others to really help - but I appreciate that you all are here.
I just felt I should make an intro before posting on any threads.