1. I needed to start a Part 5 to this thread. :thumbup:
2. My son is home for the holidays. :cloud9:
3. My anxiety after EMDR is gone & I've gotten back the emotional distance from those with NPDs I had lost. :cheer:
Quote from: Kizzie on December 22, 2018, 07:28:01 PM
3. My anxiety after EMDR is gone & I've gotten back the emotional distance from those with NPDs I had lost. :cheer:
:cheer: :cheer: :cheer: Sounds huge to me.
It's awesome BB, I'm so glad I don't get those horrible feelings every time I hear/see something about DT's malignant NPD - just too difficult to avoid everything because he's just getting worse which means I would be getting worse if I hadn't gone for some EMDR. Very grateful even if it did result in some anxiety.
1) Stopped flighting/freezing over the last two days, realised that I'm very depressed and how little I've been reading Pete Walker's books for months now.
2) Got over a little more of my fear of IT problems and worked on some major software issues!
3) Realised that my Inner Critic is running the show in terms of my thoughts/feelings/fears about the future.
1) Reading OOTS again, and journalling, is helping me 'get back on the (recovery) horse' so to speak - realising that I'm very focused on other people's opinions, issues, and feelings. For instance, I dismissed my interest in getting tattoos because my mother is strongly against them. Even though she wouldn't stop me getting one!
2) Realised that I've been engaging in workaholicism (and then crashing and burning into freeze mode from it).
3) I am able to learn Pete Walker's steps for resolving FBs.
1) This site. Thank goodness I can keep writing here when it seems necessary or beneficial again.
2) At my bike club they passed the hat, via email I think, to help me with buying a new (secondhand) bike, checked over and improved upon to my specifications by one member who works at a secondhand shop. Apparently he's got a couple of bikes in mind for me already. The financial help is one thing, almost even better is having somebody to build to my specifications for a year-round commuter bike. I feel really quite moved.
3) I can and do get up and get going again after I've 'skidded off the path' so to speak in day-to-day life.
4) Friends.
I have not come here in quite a while. Feel like I am neglecting my own thread :blink:
1. I have two interviews for assistanship positions next week! These are huge and I am very hopeful to land one of them.
2. We got to see some sunshine today
3. My roommate is cooking dinner so that I can rest tonight
Quote from: Elphanigh on February 13, 2019, 10:18:53 PM
I have not come here in quite a while. Feel like I am neglecting my own thread :blink:
No worries! Somebody like me will keep it going ;D
1. I got up before noon today.
2. I got up before my first student and even prepared for her, including assembling homework.
3. Got an email that I left my purse somewhere specific yesterday :) (Leaving it there was a bit careless but good to know I can go and get it now!)
1. Friends I will see today and hugs I will give and receive.
2. My children are safe and healthy.
3. My husband and I are going on a date tonight.
Thank you, Blueberry. I am glad someone keeps it alive. ;D
1. I spent today relaxing
2. The car socialization is improving
3. I have officially accepted an admissions offer for my Masters program. This means I have a for sure spot next fall at my top choice school.
Quote from: Elphanigh on February 17, 2019, 06:15:32 AM
3. I have officially accepted an admissions offer for my Masters program. This means I have a for sure spot next fall at my top choice school.
:cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :fireworks:
Thank you Blueberry! :hug: :hug: so good to see the excitement.
1. On that note, I will get to see campus on Friday. I have two interview for assistantships and will have some time to look around to get a feel for the place.
2. I got to rest this weekend
3. We got a little bit of sunshine today
Coming back to my own thread. I realize there are a ton of good things, and a lot of things I am grateful for today so here is a few.
1. The sun is out and I can soak in some much needed vitamin D
2. I feel stronger today
3. The people that are in my corner are the best humans I have ever had in my life. I am astounded everyday by the people that have been here for me. Endlessly grateful for all of it.
4. I feel excited about graduate school again. I had not felt that in the last week, and today I found my excitement.
Here again, think this thread will be good for me.
1) I got to eat and enjoy my coffee for a peaceful half hour in my apartment today. Was a great way to kick off the day
2) I am going to the yoga studio tonight
3) Found a new album by one of my favorite artists, made for a great music choice this morning
1) An adult student told me today how happy she is with my teaching! She feels she's learning so much. Even her boss at work told her she noticed a difference. :)
2) Undoubtedly there are other good things today but I'm not forcing myself to write them down.
1) Time alone at home.
2) YouTube. Grateful for the music and help with grounding.
3) Coffee with flavored cream.
1) I can roar again ;D ROAR!
2) Beautiful Sunshine
3) Being able to to truly smile :cheer:
Found an important application form I had misplaced :) :cheer:
Yay! always good to find paperwork.
1) The sunshine is beautiful today
2) I am rocking a warrior braid today with the rest of my hair down
3) I feel really good about my 3 mile run last night
4) I still feel so much stronger than I have been :cheer:
. An old acquaintance responded to a critical need of mine. Things like this are very hard for me to muster the courage to just ask.
2. Spring is hinting, if slowly, at its reappearance.
3. I figured out how to preserve the audio files from an online course I just completed. I read and write lots on computer, but these added features often baffle and throw me off (e.g. hit the wrong button and ... poof).
4. Only 2 weeks 'til my next therapy appointment; a bit desperate and anxious as that key component of my life has been put on hold during my t's extended time away of late.
First day of spring!
My dog, who loves me.
The warmth of sunshine.
This community. :hug:
1) This beautiful weather ;D
2) The realization that I can choose to pause
3) Seeing my own progress and heart for what it is
On a walk today:
1) smelling the fresh spring air
2) hearing the birds
3) seeing crocuses
1) Out in the garden today and did a bit of clear up so I can get on with planting soon
2) :sunny: :sunny:
3) Did 3 loads of laundry and hung them all outside; did some small cleaning and tidying jobs
1) Lay out in the garden in the warmish sunshine on my recliner and relaxed. Listened to birds and insects and looked at all the green
2) I got over my sluggishness this evening and prepared for arrival of Little Furries tomorrow
3) I did some tidying and cleaning, but didn't overdo it. I even noticed I could do some tidying while sitting down :)
From the past few days....
1. It has finally rained more than a few drops! Yay! :umbrella:
2. Some new realisations about my eating disorder
3. I'm finally acting on my impulse to write Good Things
4. Farm work and the farm community are doing me good atm
More and more Good Things came. So many I decided to move the rest to my Taking those concrete beneficial steps Journal https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=12143.msg89602#new since they are undoubtedly results from taking 'those concrete beneficial steps' :cheer:
:hug: you your honesty in your struggle and achievements is so inspiring. Just wanted to give you a big encouraging hug. Your working so hard keep it up you can do it. :hug: :applause: :cheer: :cheer:
1. Made dinner the last two days.
2. A church where many people are real and honest.
3. Relaxing time with husband and kids.
1) Spent a few hours out in the garden in the sunshine today.
2) I was thinking about pruning one of my roses when I saw two new buds! :)
3) After taking a rest, I discovered I had enough energy to wash the dishes this evening after all :)
1. Enjoyed the beautiful autumn leaves. Colorful and bright! :applause:
2. Watched a romantic movie with my partner :hug:
3. Wrote and sent instructions to a friend about something she seems to need
4. Played with my dogs, petted and hugged them
5. Went shopping for something which wasn't fun to do, but was necessary
1. Delicious hydration drinks
2. Icemaker so there's always plenty of ice for delicious hydration drinks.
3. The fact that I'm finally feeling enough of a right to take up space to feel that it's okay for me to have an icemaker and delicious hydration drinks.
1. In our new home
2. Beautiful view over a wetland reserve
3. Amazing sunrises and sunsets
New home! ❤️😀
Quote from: Kizzie on October 27, 2019, 02:07:42 PM
1. In our new home
2. Beautiful view over a wetland reserve
3. Amazing sunrises and sunsets
:cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
Kizzie, your post reminds me to look for 3 Good Things, no matter what is going on.
So, just for this evening: (1) I had the energy to wash the dishes and listened to an audio book while I was about it
(2) This led to me having impetus to do more useful things
(3) I got out my wallpaper stain-remover and started covering up smudges of this and that (mostly mosquitoes from the summer)
All this means I'm getting back on track. :)
Personal care: :cheer:
Showered and dressed
Ate breakfast and cleaned up after myself
Took pills
Household care: :applause:
Took out garbage, brought in recycling bin
Made the bed
Put away some extra supplies into closet
Although these are small things, some days I feel I need to boost my courage, energy, and feelings with whatever I can.
:cheer:
-Chris336
Quote from: Chris336 on October 30, 2019, 02:24:12 PM
Personal care: :cheer:
Showered and dressed
Ate breakfast and cleaned up after myself
Took pills
Household care: :applause:
Took out garbage, brought in recycling bin
Made the bed
Put away some extra supplies into closet
Although these are small things, some days I feel I need to boost my courage, energy, and feelings with whatever I can.
:cheer:
-Chris336
Chris, I want to offer you an extra cheer because I can so relate to this post, and know so well how these things are not necessarily "small" at all. Very well done! :cheer: And thank you. You have inspired me.
1. Work shift went by quickly.
2. Sweat pants and sweatshirt.
3. Contact (text and phone call) with two friends.
1. Kept myself safe on a very difficult day when I felt all kinds of self-destructive.
2. Ate reasonably and took all my pills.
3. Finished making freezer buckets of the turkey I cooked on Monday for this week's meal prep project.
:cheer: :cheer: :cheer: Bach! That's great - keeping yourself safe, taking pills and eating reasonably. On some days that's all I can do too, or even more than I can do. So that's a particular reason for me cheering you on :)
Sunshine! Sol is our gigantic powerhouse in the sky. It directly or indirectly gives so much of our energy.
The stars and other cosmic sources! They provide the test of Earth's energy.
Air, and in particular, oxygen! Every beat of my heart and cell in my brain appreciates the oxygen delivered from the Earth's air via my lungs.
Water! Because it makes our planet look gorgeous from space, and because it quenches my thirst when I'm thirsty.
I'm still hanging in there keeping myself safe during this prolonged excessively rough patch.
I fed my husband well this week to help with a hard week at work where he had to stay late every night.
I'm corresponding warmly with someone from my past with whom I had a difficult relationship filled with misunderstandings because when we knew each other we were young and neither of us yet understood our trauma-riddled lives.
Quote from: Bach on November 02, 2019, 03:18:30 AM
I'm still hanging in there keeping myself safe during this prolonged excessively rough patch.
I fed my husband well this week to help with a hard week at work where he had to stay late every night.
I'm corresponding warmly with someone from my past with whom I had a difficult relationship filled with misunderstandings because when we knew each other we were young and neither of us yet understood our trauma-riddled lives.
This all sounds really good, I just want to give you a sincere thumbs up.
For myself...
#1. I'm making an effort to really reconnect with my friend from high school. Today we went shopping together.
#2. Lately I've been especially anxious about the streets and cars, but today I was able to cross roads without thinking about it too much.
#3. I bought a new manga and it's very wholesome.
1. I had some signs of life today. It was a better day than I have had for a long time.
2. I made a delicious gluten free pastry from scratch.
3. I did a load of laundry and worked on cleaning my room a little bit
Quote from: Bach on November 02, 2019, 03:18:30 AM
I'm still hanging in there keeping myself safe during this prolonged excessively rough patch.
I fed my husband well this week to help with a hard week at work where he had to stay late every night.
I'm corresponding warmly with someone from my past with whom I had a difficult relationship filled with misunderstandings because when we knew each other we were young and neither of us yet understood our trauma-riddled lives.
Bach, I'm glad you are able to keep yourself safe during this period, and I hope things things start to become easier to handle soon. Self-care is incredibly important. Keep up the good work! :thumbup:
1. Catching up on rest.
2. Finding inspiration via a livestream event.
3. Feeling hope from all those fellow trauma survivors who choose to share the good/bad ups and downs of cptsd on this forum. :grouphug:
1. Electricity - We couldn't communicate like this without it
2. Physical Therapists - who provided two months of PT for lumbar radiculopathy which is now much better
3. Evergreens - so that winter won't be so dreary
4. Musicians and storytellers - who capture and preserve the wonder and awe of our inner and outer worlds
:applause: :yahoo:
#1. I'm back from a week of holiday. I've always been afraid of going on leisure trips since... things usually go wrong. But this one actually went pretty well!
#2. My pets are doing okay.
#3. I've discovered some harsh truths about a certain person, but whilst they're rather negative truths, knowing said truths make me feel more comfortable than not knowing at all.
1) My first post on this amazing forum! I feel like I'm in the deep loving embrace of a wide community.
2) A student wrote: "You should continue [teaching] like this. It's the first time I've ever been interested to come to English class."
3) I shared laughs and mocktails with a lovely GF over unlimited buffet lunch today.
4) DH and I spent an evening combing through my triggers of the day - starting to able to recognize when I'm flashing back, when I'm triggered - hooray!!!
1) Here. I finally feel that I can be myself. Wounded, strange, different, warts and all. No need to apologize. No need to be sorry for being who I am.
2) Beauty. In the snow. In the mountains.
3) The internet. Finding partners in crime in the journey to grow, to heal, to reclaim life.
Hello arale,
Welcome to the forum! I'm glad it's doing you so much good :)
________________________
1) I was at a Christmas Party today and I really enjoyed it
2) When the people round about me got up and wandered over somewhere else, I moved to sit with other people, which I've never done there before. It's a bit unusual because we're seated at tables. But today I got up and did it.
3) We sang carols at the end. Sometimes when I'm singing, I still marvel at the fact that I've healed enough from my childhood self-consciousness (definitely caused by emotional abuse) to sing in a group whether or not I'm in tune. I often don't hit all the notes, despite the fact that I sing in a choir. It's a Good Thing for me that I sing anyway.
1) Getting back to this forum, and rediscovering the relief of finding other souls with similar experiences.
2) Journalling. I am expanding the variety of journals I keep, and investing in my soul's instinct that writing will help me heal.
3) I made it this far.
Over on my Journal I wrote about how little I've accomplished today so for the record just want to write 3 Good Things:
1) I removed the beeping smoke detector from the ceiling, Googled about it, and bought the correct batteries for it and for the other beeping smoke detector I removed a long time ago. This is all very difficult for me because working with hands, with appliances and doing kind of 'handyman' jobs, all very triggering and SH-inducing, but I did it!
2) To be fair, it's good to remind myself that I did an awful lot yesterday, including tidying and cleaning up when i got home from the Christmas Party. Sometimes I just need a break.
3) I started writing my birthday party invitation. Of course I will type it and send to most friends via email, but I noticed that I simply couldn't write the first draft on my computer, so today I finally sat down and started writing by hand. That's paying attention to my own needs and seeing what changes I need to make so that I can move forwards :yes:.
4) As I was telling a friend I don't speak to often about my recent progress, I noticed firstly how animated my voice was, which means I really believe what I was saying, I can really feel my progress and that my emotions and thoughts weren't dissociated. I also noticed just how much progress I've made recently, some of it with deeply entrenched problems!
1) Feeling seen. Thank you blueberry, saylor, woodsgnome, northman, and all of you.
2) The internet. Again! I didn't know I love it so much! Well, in fact, I didn't know I owe it so much. A few days ago, I thanked it for allowing me to connect with people. Today, I thank it for allowing people to put up inspirational stuff that I can trawl through, digest, integrate, at my own pace, in the safety of my own home, sitting behind the screen. Thanks to the internet, I don't (necessarily) have to pay lots of money, travel very far (and be stressed by the travels), meet new people (and be self-conscious about my worthlessness and inadequacy), to get too much wisdom too fast.
3) Mustering courage to say "no". Wooouaf, it's not easy, but it feels good to see that I'm beginning the process of taking my place and claiming my life.
Woof, it's been a tough day. But it's good to continue practicing orienting my attention towards the good things - 'coz, indeed, good things do happen even on the worst days - just because my ability to focus on the bad things is so strong.
1) My first day on skis this season. White, untrammeled snow. Effortless glide. Silence in the woods. Filled with beauty.
2) I used to believe that I'm lost, that I don't know what I want. Today, I woke up to the fact that, in fact, I do know exactly what I want. I feel strong and powerful. At lunchtime, I didn't negotiate with anyone. I took my time and made the dish I wanted.
3) I found an ingenious way around my baking disaster. In the end, I hardly had to throw out anything, and could get 70 cookies ready for the last day of school!
Yes, this is all good, but item #3 does contain material which probably warrants at least a potential ***TRIGGER ADVISORY***. It's definitely a 'good' and happy vibe, but it required one bleak reference to an intensely grim period in my life; thus the cautious trigger advisory.
1. Despite being bummed about having to cancel my next therapy appointment (bad traveling weather) -- I'm disappointed but also feeling more confident I can continue working on my own. It may even make next time better, given how things have been going.
2. A friend of mine (one of only 2 who know and understand any of my journey's travails) was gifted a new kitten within days after what she thought was her 'last' one died.
3. Tomorrow is my favourite holiday -- St. Lucia's Day. Not only for its unique pageantry, but mostly for its message of the light of love that can come even in the darkest times. You see, it was also the exact day 2 years ago when I accepted the challenge of my therapist to continue the life I'd felt wasn't worth to continue struggling with anymore. I even lit a candle in her office to mark the occasion. I'm so happy for that special memory of St. Lucia Day's extra special symbolism. Words will never describe this moment adequately, but it feels good to share its essence. Light a candle!
Quote from: woodsgnome on December 13, 2019, 02:01:17 AM
3. Tomorrow is my favourite holiday -- St. Lucia's Day. Not only for its unique pageantry, but mostly for its message of the light of love that can come even in the darkest times. You see, it was also the exact day 2 years ago when I accepted the challenge of my therapist to continue the life I'd felt wasn't worth to continue struggling with anymore. I even lit a candle in her office to mark the occasion. I'm so happy for that special memory of St. Lucia Day's extra special symbolism. Words will never describe this moment adequately, but it feels good to share its essence. Light a candle!
Woodsgnome,
I lit a candle today in honor of your choice for life and said a prayer for you.
Thank you woodsgnome for sharing. This is so beautiful. It reminds me of the power of symbolism, which can be an ally whenever I need it.
I am one of the lucky ones who have been able to enjoy your decision to stay in this world a bit longer. Thank you for your presence.
Today was an up day compared to yesterday, so it's much easier to find 3 things:
1) For me the majority of relationships has always been about give and take. You are nice to me because you want something from me. When, once in a while, I have interactions that are really free (without asking for anything back), I finally understand what therapists / healers mean when they say that humans are nourished by relationships. I had some of those interactions today and for a moment, I glimpsed beauty in humanity.
2) Many things could have gone wrong on this very busy day. Very few things did. I only lost the thermos that my mum bought me over a decade ago. As always, I'm sad to lose companions of many past adventures, but I am also ready to move on.
3) Last day of school. It was a semester that I wasn't sure at the beginning would even begin at all. Despite the uncertainties, bad surprises, and difficult adjustments at the beginning, the semester went, more or less smoothly, and is now completed, without too many hiccups. I guess I can use this to remind myself: see, what you think for sure would turn bad doesn't always turn bad!
1) I'm making big emotion-based progress again
2) A very unexpected offer of help for getting a start on tidying and cleaning in my apartment
3) This offer inspired me to do a little bit of both on my own :) though I definitely still could do with help
4) My self-acceptance is quite high this evening
I finally
1) had a shower and hair wash
2) made some decisions on my business advertising and got back to two separate people on that
3) went to the optician's, had an eye test and ordered new lenses but can keep the old frames
4) wrote and sent two important FOO missives on practical matters
This is my first post of good things in 2020. It's not because there haven't been good things. I guess I haven't been paying as much attention to them as they deserve.
1) I wrote 3 emails of self-affirmation. I was mad and I said it! Wow!
2) I was making movies in my head and bracing for ostracization, but I got a very positive reply to my email instead.
3) A new found partner on the journey of self-discovery. In sync, in luck, infinitely grateful.
1) I stood up, grew up, and spoke my truth (well, with the help of a few white lies) because I can see clearly what matters to me.
2) I met with my two new partners on the journey. Each of them brought their own brand of steady presence with them and witnessed and supported my unfolding.
3) The people who I care about are doing well despite challenging circumstances.
Feels like a space has just opened up, the world's my oyster, again, now that I've gotten myself out of the tight corner that I squished myself into. Huuuhhhhhhhh (sigh of relief)
1) been looking after a cat for the past month and it has brought companionship and a measure of peace
2) the weather has settled from stormy
3) I felt awful and ate loads of sweets early but rescued it by making big load of bolognese that will feed me a few times and I will share that with my friend too.
1) I feel so alive today. :cheer: Scary, weird, but alive! :aaauuugh:
2) Been accompanied by some incredible partners on the journey. Infinitely grateful. Each encounter is unique, magical, and provides the container for more of the mystery to unfold.
3) I feel real bad that I said no to these people and that I haven't heard a single peep from them since I sent them the message. Not that I necessarily expect a reply. Then my inner movie maker :dramaqueen: starts to make all sorts of horror flicks - they hate me; they will never speak to me again. Then a part comes along and says, "And, even if they never speak to me again, so?" :whistling: True, it doesn't really matter. 'Coz one of the reasons I said no was that I found out what matters to me, and it's not saying yes to them or doing the project with them. I feel so much lighter. As if I can fly.
1) Tenderness, openness, vulnerability. Daring to hold them all, without running, without freaking. Just holding them gently in my heart like baby chicks.
2) The wonderful people who were part of my day today. Deep resonance.
3) Friends. Although I resonate little with them, I do appreciate how much they care for me. I'm not going to use the word love. I've still got to work out what it means.
1) Got work today.
2) Met a new person who shares the same language, cultural references. I was me in the shared space. The person said, "You are awesome." and I saw that Yes! Me as me is awesome.
3) Shared some fun time with people I care about.
4) Seizing the window of opportunity to prepare for challenging times.
:thumbup: :applause: :grouphug: Arale!